Dennis Quaid: "I Saw Myself Being Dead" During A Cocaine Binge

By Kelly Burch 12/06/18

Dennis Quaid said in a recent interview that in the midst of his cocaine addiction he was doing two grams a day.

Dennis Quaid opened up about his past addiction to cocaine.
Photo via YouTube

Actor Dennis Quaid, who has said that he did cocaine almost daily during the '80s, told The Sunday Times this week that during one binge he saw himself being dead, a frightening experience that led the star to put himself in rehab. 

“I was doing about two grams a day,” Quaid said, according to People. “I was lucky. I had one of those white-light experiences where I saw myself being dead and losing everything I had worked for my whole life.”

That led Quaid to check into rehab, which he completed in 1990, before marrying actress Meg Ryan in 1991. The pair were married until 2001. 

Quaid used to use cocaine and alcohol together. 

“I would do coke and I would use alcohol to come down,” he said. “I liked coke. I liked it to go out.”

Quaid said that when he stopped using he still experienced cravings for the drug, saying he “missed it for quite a while.” Earlier this year, Quaid said that getting sober was a challenge. 

“A lot of it had to be learned,” he said during an interview with People magazine in March “And part of it is just where I come from, I guess. Sometimes your hopes get ahead of your dreams, so you can get disappointed that way. Adversity is the thing that teaches you how to handle that.”

However, these days Quaid, 64, gets his high from working out regularly. 

“I’ve always had a high metabolism. I get a high from exercising. I really do,” he said. “I think it does what all those antidepressants are supposed to do.”

He has also taken up meditation, “which puts me into the present moment because that’s all there really is,” he said. “Because either you worry about the future or there’s something about the past, but if you’re in the present moment, then there’s no problem at all. I’m sitting here. I’m just fine.”

Quaid said earlier this year that despite his past drug use and three public divorces, he’s content now. 

“I’m most happy when I just kind of get out of my own way and let things happen,” he said. “I’m not the guy that’s living an enlightened experience all the time; I blow my top many times. In life we’re either forced, kicking and screaming, into change—or we learn to cope with it. But I really am at peace now.”

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Kelly Burch writes about addiction and mental health issues, particularly as they affect families. Follow her on TwitterFacebook, and LinkedIn.