Test Your Celebrity Rehab IQ!

By McCarton Ackerman 12/06/11

For five tumultuous seasons, brave "stars" like Michael Lohan and Frankie Lons battled for sobriety—and captured our hearts. But how well did you really know them?

Dr. Drew and his Celebrity Rehab retinue Illustration by Danny Jock

1. Which celebrity never appeared on the show?

A. Janice Dickinson
B. Eric Roberts
C. Victoria Sellers
D. Jeff Conaway

2. Which of the following Rehab alum has never released an adult film?

A. Brigitte Nielsen
B. Amy Fisher
C. Jaimee Foxworth
D. "Chyna" Laurer

3. Which cast member most stretches the limits of the term “celebrity”?

A. Jessica Kiper
B. Frankie Lons
C. Ricco Rodriguez
D. Nikki McKibbin
E. All of the above

4. Who was removed from Season Five because she didn’t actually have an addiction?

A. Dina Lohan
B. Michelle Salahi
C. LaToya Jackson
D. Courtney Stodden

5. Finish this statement: When Heidi Fleiss confronted Tom Sizemore during the Season Three graduation ceremony, she said, “The thought of being with you...”

A. “...makes me sick to my stomach.”
B. “...still turns me on.”
C. “...makes me want to get high.”
D. “...would turn a woman gay.”

6. Who has appeared on more than one season?

A. Jeff Conaway
B. Seth “Shifty Shellshock” Binzer
C. Steven Adler
D. All of the above

7. On Season Two, why did Gary Busey threaten to leave the show?

A. He objected to being seen as a patient.
B. He demanded the staff also treat his Goldendoodle.
C. He immediately clashed with Jeff Conaway.
D. He objected to Bob Forrest’s hat.

8. Who is the only cast member to ever be kicked off for bad behavior?

A. Steven Adler
B. Jeff Conaway
C. Michael Lohan
D. Rachel Uchitel

9. In addition to alcohol and opiates, Tiger Woods’ mistress Rachel Uchitel suffered from which less conventional addiction?

A. Tanning
B. Teeth whitening
C. Love
D. Plastic surgery

10. During Season Five, Bai Ling ended up fleeing to a bizarre place during treatment. Where was it?

A. A garbage can
B. The roof
C. Underneath her bed
D. Dr. Drew's private office

11. Which Rehabber has NOT been arrested since appearing on the show?

A. Tom Sizemore
B. Michael Lohan
C. Jason Davis
D. Rodney King

12. Who brought dildos and other sex toys into Rehab that were immediately confiscated?

A. Dennis Rodman
B. Mary Carey
C. Gary Busey
D. Tawny Kitaen

13. On Season Four, Leif Garrett ordered a beer on a group outing. Bob Forrest took heat for his response. What was it?

A. Hey, it’s just one one beer!
B. Leif’s issues are with cocaine and heroin, not alcohol.
C. “I’d want to drink too if I had to be around Frankie Lons.”
D. This is normal behavior for an addict.

14. Dr. Drew cried just once in five seasons. What was the occasion?

A. Amy Fisher said she was going to quit porn for good.
B. Brigitte Nielsen's children spoke about how they were afraid she would die.
C. He was moved by country singer Mindy McCready’s singing performance.
D. He was affected by Mackenzie Phillip’s story of incestual abuse.

15. On season one, actress / porn star Jaimee Foxworth carried which comfort crutch to the group sessions?

A. A blanket
B. A teddy bear
C. A pillow
D. A gun

16. Which Rehab relative displayed such an impressive fit of rage during the family reunion episode that he landed a spot on Celebrity Boxing?

A. Joey Kovar's brother
B. Michael Lohan's girlfriend
C. Jeremy London's wife
D. Amy Fisher's husband

17. During the final three years of his addiction, how much did brawny Baywatch star Jeremy Jackson spend on steroids?

A. $1,000,000
B. $200,000
C. $100,000
D. He never had to pay for them

18. What did Party of Five star Jeremy London insist was to blame for his drug addiction?

A. Adolescent bedwetting
B. Strangers kidnapped him, drove him to the desert, and forced him to smoke crack.
C. His wife injected him with heroin in his sleep.
D. Janice Dickinson

19. What childhood dream did porn star Mary Carey pursue in sobriety?

A. Leif Garrett
B. Classical Ballet
C. Quantum Physics
D. Porn

20. An entire episode of Season Five was devoted to actress Sean Young confronting her fear of:

A. Children
B. Horses
C. Intimacy
D. James Woods

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McCarton Ackerman is a freelance writer and editor living in Portland, Oregon. He has been a contributor for The Fix since October 2011, writing on a wide range of topics ranging from medical marijuana in Colorado to the world's sexiest drug smugglers. Follow him on Linkedin and Twitter.