Stepping Into A Better Comfort Zone!
Don't ever underestimate your ability to make changes in your life. The power to change how and what you think about what's happening now in your life – is within you at all times. Dig down. It's there. You might not know it, but trust that it’s there!
To do that, you have to change old truth's that currently ring like a pack of lies. Grow tired of feeling weary all the time. Grow bored with the same-shit-different-day routine. Chuck that loosing feeling. Stop believing there is no one out there in the world willing to help you because, that's a brain trick that allows you to lay blame elsewhere at every opportunity you can when life is not going your way or seems unfair. Stop believing it doesn't get any better than this! It CAN and it WILL if you allow it!
What if you told yourself a new story, that there really are people out there willing to help you rather than sticking with all your 'why me ' self-talks! Life is proactive. If you’re sitting there, wallowing in everything that is wrong with your life, YOU are the one making it impossible to let any or all the possibilities make themselves known to you. All those thoughts running around in your brain are what is planning your journey and your future. Your actions or inactions determine whether you move forward or stay stuck at a self-induced roadblock. The choice is always, and has always been, yours.
If you're already an expert on feeling like crap, maybe today's the day you choose to change directions, to take the path towards feeling happier simply by thinking differently.
"YOU WILL ALWAYS BE AS MISERABLE
AS YOU TELL YOURSELF YOU ARE!"
“YOU WILL ONLY BE AS HAPPY
AS YOU ALLOW YOURSELF TO BE!”
You are the gatekeeper of all your thoughts! If you want something different, you have to think something different!
Re-perceive your old perceptions and you can unload some of the old baggage you've been carrying around day after day. All you really have to do is hold on to the things that actually matter, the things that you can control (meaning YOU), and ditch all of the minutia that’s causing the noise in your head. In other words, STOP trying to be the owner of other people’s problems! (See my previous post titled: https://www.thefix.com/living-sober/learning-swim-through-your-muddy-waters)
Here's a little writing assignment. Get a piece of paper and a pen. Write down all the benefits you've received from all those awful things you tell yourself about your life and all the excuses you've used so you don't have to move out of your (uncomfortable) comfort zone.
[HINT: you will only need a small piece of paper because there are no benefits!]
Like the old saying goes: you can't keep doing the same thing over and over again and expect it to turn out differently. Life doesn't work like that. You've trapped yourself in all the same old bullshit. You can't see the way out because there is no way out unless you change how you think about you, about what you really want, about what you're doing to get to where you want to be, and about what you are actually capable of doing. If you don't change your thinking, well, I hate to tell you this but, nothing changes.
Maybe it's time to look at how long you've been doing the easy thing that keeps you in the circle of misery? Ask yourself WHY you are still doing that. The easy road, paved by your lifetime of excuses, will always keep you exactly where you are right now. You can sit there and wallow all you want, but until you start breaking some of these very bad, useless habits, you're not going to feel any better anytime soon.
For anyone who's gotten where they want to be, trust me, their road was not paved with gold. All they really did was to stop finding every damned excuse in the book to stop them from going any further. THEY STOPPED USING EXCUSES! They veered off the easy road and ventured out over the dusty, difficult, back roads to mine that gold for themselves because #1: They believed in themselves. They believed their goals to be reachable no matter how difficult the road would be. They laid out a plan and then put one foot in front of the other and kept going—no matter what. #2: They worked within the parimeters of their strengths and vacated the part of them where their weaknesses live. They turned 'no you can't' into 'watch this'! What they did was put all their trust in themselves. They refused to let their weakness have any control over what they were trying to accomplish! They weighed the odds and the risks, and likely had to make choices that probably were difficult, but they persevered. THEY had THEIR own BACK!
There is no easy road. It doesn't exist, and until you wrap your brain around that, you will remain exactly where you are and you will continue to live excuse to excuse.
Ask yourself this: How long have I been doing the same thing, over and over again, always getting the same results? Maybe your old thinking looks a little like this.
Well, they said I...... (couldn't, wouldn't shouldn't, would never)
I was taught that I...... (didn't have what it takes, I'd never amount to anything)
I grew up believing I....... (am not smart enough, am untalented, am not worthy)
It's not my fault that I...... (can't do what I want to do, I shouldn't take risks)
There aren't any opportunities that I ......(believe I can take on because they're too hard, because it's too much work, because it’s not a sure thing)
Our ego tells us: stay away from the things you think you will fail at because ego needs/wants to win. We argue because we want to be right. We procrastinate because we fear failure. We make excuses so we can pass along responsibility to someone else. Ego is the very root of most of your problems. Your thinking goes something like - I'm still right if I don't put myself in a position of being wrong. See the problem there? If you stand steadfast in your comfort zone, even when that comfort zone makes you miserable, you leave no room for improvement! ‘That’s my story and I’m sticking to it’, thinking, shuts down all hope that life could feel or be different!
So, now you need to get another piece of paper. Write down all the benefits of changing even one behavior. (You might actually need a journal for this one) because there are probably dozens, if not hundreds of benefits. When you're done with the list, go back and compare it with the first one. Surprising, isn't it?
Now it's up to you to decide which list you're going to work with. You can stay in your comfort zone, or you can expand, or even eliminate its boundaries all together.
You want a badass life? You've got to do same badass work to get there!
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