12 Steps of Recovery for Love Addicts
I have written an entire book about recovery from love addiction, but sometimes you just have to keep it simple and hand out advice in manageable pieces. So I have created some blog articles about healing in twelve easy steps. In previous blogs you will find . . .
12 Steps to Building Self-Esteem
12 Steps to Transcending Childhood Trauma
12 Steps to Nourishing the Soul
12 Alternative Steps for Agnostics
# # #
This article is a list of the most important things love addicts must do in recovery.
1. Increase your self-esteem so you attract healthy people.
2. Stop believing in love at first sight and instant attraction being the basis of a relationship.
3. Give up excessive fantasizing about romance and “living happily ever after.”
4. Take a look at your attraction to drama and excitement in relationships.
5. Stop rushing a relationship. Go slowly. Get to know someone before you talk about love.
6. Look for reciprocity. Do not give more than you are given.
7. Do not suffer just because you are in love. You deserve better.
8. Do not be ruled by your libido. Compatibility is just as important as passion.
9 Do not confuse want with need. We want a romantic relationship, but we don’t need one.
10 If you have to be controlling to get your needs met, you are in the wrong relationship.
11.Walk away if the person you are dating is ambivalent. Date people who want the same things you do.
12. Do not focus your whole life on your relationship. Find balance with friends, work, and hobbies.
Susan Peabody is the author of Addiction to Love: Overcoming Obsession and Dependency in Relationships, and The Art of Changing: Your Path to a Better Life. For more about Susan see her website http://brightertomorrow.net/