Florida Man Stole Menthols After Drugs Made Him "Invisible"

By May Wilkerson 07/03/13

He returns to Walgreens four months later and tries to make amends for the unseen crime.

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Nobody said making amends was an easy process. A man in Fort Pierce, Florida tried to reimburse a Walgreens for a carton of menthol cigarettes he claimed to have stolen 4-5 months earlier, while under the influence of "street drugs." He apologized to the cashier and tried to pay for the stolen smokes with his debit card, but he didn't have sufficient funds to cover the 60$ carton. The cashier called police but they said they couldn't press charges since there was no surveillance footage, and the man had finished all of the cigarettes, leaving no evidence to prove the crime. To further complicate the matter, the man told police he had been invisible at the time of the robbery. "According to (the man), the drugs gave him the ability to become invisible," says the police report. "(The man) used his powers of invisibility to pass through the counter and take a carton of Kool brand menthol cigarettes undetected." The man was issued a trespass warning and escorted off the property without paying for the cigarettes.

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May Wilkerson is a writer, comic and Managing Editor @someecards. Co-host of the podcast Crazy; In Bed w/alyssalimp. She is also the top Google result for "insufferable lunatic." Follow this insufferable lunatic on Twitter.