Cocaine Takes A Nosedive

In the 1980s, cocaine partied with the coolest and richest artists and stockbrokers in Lower Manhattan and became the subject of fancy Jay McInerney novels. Today, cocaine lives in a dilapidated split level on the outskirts of Naperville and gets hung up on by all its old club friends. This is according to the latest National Survey on Drug Use and Health (in so many words), which shows that cocaine abuse decreased 37 percent in the U.S. between 2006 and 2010. More impressively, the number of workplace positive drug tests for cocaine declined 65 percent during the same period. Why has cocaine become so unpopular? The Seattle Post-Intelligencer lists a number of reasons, from diminished availability to the efficacy of prevention programs. Our theory: people heard about levamisole-laced cocaine and its flesh-rotting side effects and decided to abuse other drugs. Anyway, if you need to reach cocaine she's at home listening to old Tears for Fears records and waxing nostalgic.