New Booze-Free Whiskey Comes in A Can
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Just in time for Christmas, a Florida-based beverage company is rolling out a new whiskey that packs all the punch of this powerful spirit, but none of the buzz. Called ArKay, this water-based drink is made up of flavorings, chemicals, and colorings, and is packaged in bottles and the more casual aluminum can. Billing itself as “the world’s first alcohol-free whisky-flavored drink,” ArKay is certified Halal to appeal to a market of aspirational Islamic teetotalers, and manufactured in factories in the tropical paradise of Panama. As expected, the beverage has come under fire from the Scotch Whisky Association, and, presumably, anyone with sense. “It is not possible to make alcohol-free whisky,” an SWA spokesman tell The Fix. “This company is trying to exploit whisky’s reputation.”
ArKay is certainly trying to exploit something, though it’s hard to imagine which market the beverage is aiming for. People who don’t drink for religious reasons have never developed a taste for whiskey, while people in recovery are unlikely to have a nostalgic mocktail mixed with canned whiskey. Up next: for those who miss the nasal drip, a non-narcotic cocaine to accompany it.