5 Ways to Meet Sober Dates

By The Fix staff 06/25/19

Connecting with others in recovery doesn’t have to be hard.

Couple on a sober date

There are very few things about life in addiction that were easy. But, meeting someone new was pretty simple. After all, you simply needed to stroll into a bar or a party, get some liquid courage and offer to buy a cute person a drink.

In sobriety it can be much trickier to meet people who you are interested in romantically. You’re not comfortable slipping into a bar or a booze filled mixer, and you can’t rely on substances for a confidence boost.

Despite that, summer is a great time to connect with other people who are in recovery. Here are five ways to meet sober dates, and ensure you have a summer to remember.

  1. Use sober dating sites.

Today, more people than ever meet online. Not only have dating sites and apps allowed you access to more eligible singles than ever before, but they have also allowed people to look for people in specific niches. In recent years, more sober dating sites have popped up to connect people who are in recovery and looking for love.

Sober dating sites are great, because you don’t need to worry about breaking the news of your sobriety. Instead, you know that you’re in a group of like-minded people, taking one big worry off the table from the start.

  1. Connect with the sober-ish movement.

If you’re not sure whether you want to date someone else who is in recovery, you can try meeting people who are involved with the sober-ish movement, reexamining their relationship with alcohol and other substances. These people have already rejected society’s idea that alcohol is necessary to have a good time, and they’re open to meeting other people who are sober. The movement is becoming so popular that some are calling 2019 the Sober-ish summer.

  1. Volunteer

Any activity that gets you out and about will help you meet new people that you might be interested in dating. But volunteering is an especially great way to meet people. That’s because you are automatically aligning with people who have shared interests: if you’re volunteering at an animal shelter you’re going to meet fellow animal lovers, for example. In addition, people who are volunteering are giving of their time freely, so they’re likely connected with their personal growth or higher power, just like people in recovery.

  1. Take advantage of summer outings

Summer is the perfect time to try new outdoor activities. Although these outings are explicitly for people looking to date, they are a great way to connect with a new group. Community centers, Parks and Recreation Departments and outdoor clubs all organize summer hiking, kayak trips and other adventures that are perfect for connecting with others. People in these groups are generally health-oriented, and are likely open to dating someone who is sober.

  1. Take a class

During the summer, school is out, but there are many opportunities to learn a new skill. Cities, museums and restaurants all offer summer classes on everything ranging from pottery to cooking. Even if you don’t meet someone interesting during the class you’ll come away with a new skill and a fun memory. After all, what’s life in recovery about if it’s not trying something new every now and then?

Although it’s tempting to date within the rooms or with other people who are in your recovery program, it is generally best to avoid this. You want your recovery group to remain your safe space, without the complications of a budding relationship. If you do wind up dating someone in your program, it is a good idea that both of you keep some parts of your recovery separate, like maintaining separate meetings in addition to the ones you attend together. That way, you always have a safe space to focus on your sobriety without the distractions of your relationship.

Sober Dating Site connects people in recovery.

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