Robert Pattinson Flames Out

Joan and Mellissa Rivers were nowhere in sight, and the paparazzzi were alarmingly absent. But hot on the heels of last month's Oscars, a California anti-smoking coalition recently hosted a slightly less-glamorous awards ceremony in Sacramento recently—an annual event intended to raise public awareness of the evil influence of tobacco in popular movies. Not surprisingly, the 16th annual Hackademy Awards, sponsored by a group called Breathe California, ignored such conventional favorites as The King's Speech and The Social Network, in which cigarettes and Havana cigars pop up onscreen as occasional props. But the Hackademy's voters were especially cruel to the allegedly popular teen flick Remember Me, a movie which none of us can quite remember.  Voters reserved special venom for the film's chain-smoking star Robert Pattinson, who was blasted for being “barely seen onscreen without a cigarette in his hand and a plume of cigarette smoke framing his face.” Jason Bateman on the other hand—apparently the Tom Cruise of the no-nicotine set—fared a lot better, winning the Hackademy's "Best Actor" award for a gripping scene in which he furiously snatched a cigarette away from a messy Jennifer Aniston in The Switch. Reprising her rejection at the Oscars, Mila Kunis also went home empty-handed. The No-Smoking cinemestes griped that the actress had smoked cigarettes “as a needless prop for her dark role” in Black Swan, a film in which Kunis played a battered ballet dancer—which strikes us as a bit unfair. After all, have you ever met a ballerina who didn't chain smoke two packs of Marlboro Lights a day?